Written by Aaina Saini – The Positives to Online Dating
Whether it be by throwing yourself firsthand in the pool or hearing the frustrated ramblings of a friend who has attempted to find partners through various online platforms, online dating has essentially become a coming-of-age university experience. For those of you who believe love is a chemical reaction or are champions of the scientific method, why would you refute the merits of online dating? An algorithm based method that uses data to match similar people from a large pool who are actively searching for a partner sounds quite foolproof.
The stigma behind the notion of ‘online dating’ is highly misleading. Yes, the term does suggest a lack of human connection, or perhaps surrendering the entire process of ‘falling in love’ to an inhuman digital platform. But the online dating process becomes much more human when you consider that the actual stakes of the scenario are not so different from an in-person meetup: at the initial meeting stage – whether it be through text or prior interaction – both means of meeting share an unknown, an apprehension of the other party’s true selves and intentions. Thus even for the hopeless romantic, there is no reason to write off online dating: alternative methods of meeting people,, also do not guarantee an immediate spark (if such a guarantee even exists).
Furthermore, online dating platforms offer a vastly greater selection of potential matches than the acquaintances your mother or best friend might have. These dating sites benefit from significant scale: even if many profiles don’t appeal to you, the sheer ‘numbers game’ increases the chances of discovering someone who aligns with your preferences. Rosenfeld, a researcher at the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences has found that in a nationally representative sample of people in the United States in 2017, about 39% of people met their partners online. The research extended to the fact that the success or foundation of a relationship did not depend on whether the people met online. In an era where nearly everything we consume is (unromantically) linked to some algorithm, I’d say that the ends sufficiently justify the means.
In fact, who’s to say that you can’t have your cake and eat it too? Online dating could definitely serve as a powerful augment to your in-person search for a relationship. After all, would your internship-hungry self swear off LinkedIn to network and find referrals or other opportunities exclusively in person?
Sure, you could say that it’s great to meet people naturally and in-person without being on the lookout for someone – till it isn’t and you need to call for Angela. This does not imply that boundaries cannot be crossed when meeting people online, but online dating still allows each party to set safer, consensual terms in advance – something that is less likely in a spontaneous, organic meetup context.
Beyond safety, online dating also offers unique advantages to those who may struggle with traditional dating norms. This is particularly true for LGBTQ+ individuals, who often face challenges in identifying like-minded partners in everyday social interactions. Unlike traditional settings where sexual orientation may not be immediately apparent, dating apps like Hinge allow users to specify sexual preferences. People lament the superficial nature of dating profiles, but there’s a reason why they stick around: it gives people an unspoken mutual understanding, and can grease the gears of awkward, sensitive conversations in the beginning (like how many kids you want to have). No matter your sexual or romantic orientation, or even just your current inclinations, you can seek out partners who are solely interested in physical relationships, those focused on romance, or any mix of the two.
With advancements in technology, as well as innovative methods, the landscape of online dating has changed. The process has evolved from a lifeless desktop portal of essays and phrases to something more innate, visual and emotional. It has in some form started resembling how humans date by including features like videos, stories and insightful questions.
Independent of meeting someone on the bus route home or at a friend’s party, online dating has become much more human and allows for a greater possibility of truly finding your ‘soulmate’ – do you really believe that out of 8 billion people, the one for you just happens to shop at your local grocery store?
Lastly, finding a partner who fits right with you is crucial since it defines a great portion of your life; so to reject a method with which you have nothing to lose and possibly a lot to gain is being downright close-minded and afraid of taking chances. So no matter if you are a Sheldon Cooper who swears by logic and evidence or a Romeo-Juliet, true-love-above-anything-else enthusiast, online dating has something for everyone.
Written by Paavas Bansal – The Downsides to Online Dating
Online dating is supposed to make finding love easier. But the truth is online dating has turned into a game rather than a genuine way to build meaningful connections. Instead of fostering real relationships, it encourages people to fall in love with the “idea” of someone rather than their actual self.
When people create an online dating profile, they don’t present their true selves, but rather e a version that they believe will get the most matches. Carefully-selected pictures, exaggerated bios, and witty one-liners are all part of the performance. This digital mask makes it difficult to know who someone truly is, yet it’s what initiates most modern relationships.
Carefully crafting an idealized version of yourself to present to others is essentially designing a character in a video game. And just as players assess other characters in a game, online daters judge profiles as if they were NPCs rather than real human beings with complexities, emotions, and depth. This leads to a winner-takes-all phenomenon: only a few profiles that precisely check all the boxes are disproportionately desired by the many. This creates the opportunity for a smorgasbord of extortionate subscription plans that prey on the frustrated “many” who are left behind. With the odds rigged against these subscribers, the house always wins in the end.
Yet given the crushing impact on self-esteem dating apps can have on others, I often see people swiping through profiles “for fun” when they’re bored. The pursuit of “getting as many options as possible,” has unfortunately trivialised human connection, conditioning us to see romantic prospects as entertainment or a “numbers game” rather than genuine opportunities to form meaningful relationships.
I agree that online dating allows people to meet individuals they may not have met otherwise. In a traditional setting, interactions can be uncertain. Someone you meet might already be in a relationship, uninterested, or simply not in the right place for dating. Online platforms remove some of this ambiguity, ensuring that both parties are at least theoretically open to connection.
In real life, attraction builds through shared experiences, organic conversations, and the subtleties of human interaction. Online dating removes these layers of depth and instead prioritizes first impressions based on a few pictures and a couple sentences. A relationship that begins with this kind of façade is already built on shaky ground.
To make matters worse, many online daters are addicted to the chase, not the connection. These people or “players” don’t even want a relationship, they just crave the thrill of being desired. They swipe out of boredom, chat with no real intention, and ghost as soon as interest fades. In this gamified environment, people are more invested in the excitement of flirting than in the effort required to maintain a meaningful relationship.
I agree that online dating allows people to meet individuals they may not have met otherwise. In a traditional setting, interactions can be uncertain. Someone you meet might already be in a relationship, uninterested, or simply not in the right place for dating. Online platforms remove some of this ambiguity, ensuring that both parties are at least theoretically open to connection.
However, in real life, relationships often develop organically without the pressure of predetermined expectations. We meet people in various settings and gradually come to appreciate their personalities, quirks, and values. Over time, we fall for who they are, not because they fit an ideal mould, but because of the bond we build with them. Online dating removes this natural progression. From the moment we see a profile, we are forced to evaluate someone solely through the lens of whether they fit our concept of an ‘ideal partner.’ If they don’t check all the right boxes, they are dismissed before we even have the chance to truly know them. This approach limits genuine connection, as it encourages us to seek a two-dimensional, ‘perfect match’, rather than allowing a meaningful relationship to develop naturally over time.
Hence, even though online dating platforms claim to help people connect, their matchmaking relies on arbitrary filters like height, job title, or even vague personality traits. In real life, people often fall for someone unexpectedly, based on chemistry, shared experiences, and intangible qualities that algorithms simply cannot predict or measure. Fortunately, our generation is coming to realise this, as usage has dropped off by up to 16% in the top 10 dating apps since 2024.
In many ways, online platforms overcomplicate dating by making it feel like a game or a marketplace rather than a natural, meaningful experience. Real relationships thrive on depth, emotional investment, and effort—things that online dating often discourages in favour of instant gratification and endless options.
