Written by Amelia Hancock
Illustrated by Francesca Corno
It’s no secret at a university so obsessed with internships and academic success; dating is often put on the back burner. Between deadlines, career talks, and the constant pressure to figure out your future, romance is often reduced to a half-hearted swipe on a dating app every few weeks. But love – or something that vaguely resembles it – has a funny way of sneaking into university life. No matter how hard you try to avoid it, sooner or later you’ll be caught up in the mess of it.
It always starts in the first week—scanning the lecture hall, taking in the faces that will define your next few years. And then you spot them. Maybe it’s the way they glance around looking just as lost as you or the way they lean back in their seat. You start imagining what it would be like if they ended up in your class, maybe even getting paired for a presentation together, hoping for an unlikely chance encounter. However, a word of advice: while it’s easy to get caught in fantasies, don’t hold on too tightly. Instead of clinging onto idealised love, the most meaningful relationships come from the unexpected. Either way, they’ve now become the only reason you drag yourself out of bed for your 9 am lecture on a Monday morning.
Then there are the club nights. The romance of the dim lights, cheap wine, and Taylor Swift’s “Love Story” blaring at full volume convinces you that the stranger you’ve just locked eyes with is the love of your life. At 2 am, swaying together in the midst of a sweaty crowd at Sports Night can almost feel cinematic. But the sun rises again, the anxiety-induced hangover sets in. You spot them in the library, looking less mysterious and more like any other sleep-deprived student, dressed in a Rugby Team hoodie—the regret seeps in. You may be tempted to replay that moment in your head but remember it’s all part of the university experience. Not every connection has to be a lifelong romance.
Or maybe it’s a house party. One minute you’re clutching your first drink, trying to find your feet, and the next thing you know, you’re in a corner telling your unfiltered life story to a stranger. The conversation flows effortlessly, the music has faded into the background and the rest of the room has been forgotten. There’s a connection between the two of you, but when you bump into them the next day, it’s almost like it never happened at all. These brief connections may come with embarrassment, but enjoy the vulnerability and excitement in the moment without overthinking it.
Flatmates are an entirely different kind of mistake. At first, it’s fun and convenient—grabbing dinner together, movie marathons, and sneaking into their room in the dead of night. But then the love affair fizzles out as it usually does. A simple trip to the kitchen seems like the end of the world. You pause at the door, praying for it to be empty, and when you realise it’s not, you’ve re-entered your room in a matter of seconds. Now every interaction is laced with an underlying tension and the flatmate dinners are no more. While you may have crossed the lines of friendship, the awkwardness will pass, so don’t stress it too much.
Dating apps only add to the chaos. You swipe mindlessly – prompt after prompt, rolling your eyes as guys tell you their greatest strength is “getting their hoodie back” – until you see a face of familiarity. You swipe right. But then you see them on campus, with only a few messages of small talk being exchanged. A quick glance of acknowledgement passes between you, but you walk past each other and then in true university fashion, the romance is dead before it has begun. As someone who has been in your shoes before, there’s no need to put all your hope into one conversation! The number of people on dating apps is never-ending, with countless profiles to scroll through, each offering the potential for a meaningful connection.
So, before you dive in, remember you don’t have to have everything figured out. University is a time for discovery about your career, relationships, and most importantly, yourself. Don’t get too caught up in trying to make every fleeting romance into something permanent. Dating at university is a chaotic mix of awkward encounters and situations that could have been avoided with just a little less vodka. But it’s all part of the experience. Whether it’s a fun night out, a brief connection, a passing crush, or a messy situationship, welcome the spontaneity. I promise you will look back on these moments in the years to come with a smile and only a touch of regret. And who knows, maybe amidst the mayhem you may just find a real romance.
