The Oscars of the LSE SU

LSE’s students are looking forward to the glitziest night in the SU calendar: the Students’ Union Election Results Night. But the event has not avoided controversy. The SU has planned a shake-up to the traditional plans in an attempt to engage more students. Although some of the changes have been met with glee, many have caused intense, rage-fuelled reactions. Here’s all you need to know about the new format.

If the Oscars can barely get away with a long ceremony, then the SU certainly can’t. To trim down the usual five-hour run-time of the event, the SU has decided to announce the results for Environment and Ethics Officer and Social Mobility and Class Officer backstage during the JP Morgan Spring Week ad breaks, because LSE wouldn’t miss the opportunity to sell-out to massive corporations.

But it’s not all bad news. A much-needed audience resuscitation will arrive half way through in the form of a performance by the RogueNotes. There are also rumours that the cast of Sweeney Todd are scheduled to appear. They are likely to perform ‘A Little Priest’ as a reflection of all the petty backstabbing that will have taken place during the campaign.

The Returning Officer may not return to host the event this year. The SU are trawling through the comments of LSELove posts to seek a popular, yet ever so slightly controversial, candidate for the job.

And finally, the SU was able to pull off one final, stunning U-turn of the academic year. After fierce backlash the SU has rebranded their ‘Most Popular Candidate’ award as the ‘General Secretary’ position. Some people couldn’t handle the truth.

Join us for Results Night on Thursday 21st March. The Beaver shall be in attendance, ready to comment on all the results. Good luck to all the candidates!

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